I have moved my blog over to Wordpress! All my posts have been migrated, so I suggest you come and check it out! New blog!
This blog will remain up though, for posterity mostly.
Monday, August 12, 2013
Friday, August 9, 2013
Noble Hearth [Poetry]
Oh Hestia, you noble hearth
I bear my breast to you
From your heat sweat drips down my brow
A trickle down my eyes, burning them
Down my neck, preferring to rest on my collar bone
Till a movement I make
This hearth I tend not for me
And not for who I know or knew
For someone yet to be known to me
For someone known only to you
Burn away hostility noble Goddess
I feel your flames lap at my face
Purify me oh noble Goddess
No pollution has touched my soul
But do away with the inhospitality within it
Let me be a vessel for your kindness
For there is no joy without you
I bear my breast to you
From your heat sweat drips down my brow
A trickle down my eyes, burning them
Down my neck, preferring to rest on my collar bone
Till a movement I make
This hearth I tend not for me
And not for who I know or knew
For someone yet to be known to me
For someone known only to you
Burn away hostility noble Goddess
I feel your flames lap at my face
Purify me oh noble Goddess
No pollution has touched my soul
But do away with the inhospitality within it
Let me be a vessel for your kindness
For there is no joy without you
Once Upon a Time, Conor was in a Frat.
Once upon a time I was in a fraternity.
I know, I know, you must have fallen out of your chair at that sentence, so I'll give you a minute to compose yourself.
Done? Okay.
It was my Freshman year of College. I had never really thought about fraternities or joining one, I thought it certainly wasn't for me. At my Freshman orientation I found out about them and found out about all the wonderful opportunities they could afford me. I though well, maybe there is something to it. I carefully began investigating the available fraternities, I checked their pages, scoured for photos, and basically saw what kind of air they gave off. Did they seem aggressive? Douchy? Friendly? Kind? I rushed and only went to one fraternity's events, Phi Kappa Tau.
They seemed like good guys, they had a good mixture of folks. Some were geeky like myself, some were conservative, some were gay, some were liberal, but none of them were 'bros'. I was enthralled when I received a bid from them.
Bid day was interesting, it was surprising to see how many other folks received bids from the different fraternities and how diverse they were. There were some guys who were clearly destined to become the bro-esque guys that swim in alcohol and party all the time. There were other guys who looked like skater punks. There were exceptionally flamboyant men, there were exceptionally manly men. Men of every stripe, creed, race, and orientation were there to receive bids that morning. Going up on stage and accepting the bid was kind of exhilarating to be honest.
Then came the pinning. Being pinned was. . .definitely an experience. It was the first act of initiation into the group when I became recognized as an associate member (and thus not fully initiated.), Three other men were pinned with me (one was picked up shortly after the formal pledge period). I wore that pin with pride. I was proud to be a part of the group, proud of what we were doing and what we would do. I saw success in our future. You see, at that time we were what is known as a 'colony' meaning we didn't have a charter yet but were working towards getting one. At the time of the pinning I was convinced we'd have one very soon.
Homecoming rolled around shortly after I got pinned and I got to experience the pleasure of pomping a float. In case you don't know, pomping is an insanely tedious and repetitive task that will eventually result in you getting pomping tissue stuck to your jeans due to the spray on glue. It was a lot of work, and I didn't even do a ton of pomping when compared to the lovely ladies of Kappa Kappa Gamma (I tell you, they wanted to WIN that float contest.) I even got to ride on the float and wave to little kids, make eagle shouts. It was a great deal of fun.
Eventually though, some conflicts with other people and disagreements with where some of the leadership was going led me to drop. To this day I'm not entirely sure if that was the right decision on my part. I had a lot of fun with these guys though, and being in a fraternity gave me some experiences and some particular perspectives.
There are a few things I learned from this.
The first one is that organization is not a bad thing nor is leadership. Sure, when you have this stuff you have a lot of petty politics that occurs and a bit of tiara chasing occurs but you also are able to get more work done than an individual person. We volunteered and cleaned up parks, staffed SUSAN G KOMEN events and worked at a charity haunted house and in each one of these things our group did more work than an individual could do by themselves. We were able to do this through communication and organization, and we had people volunteer that normally wouldn't to help make the group look better.
You also look out for each other and support each other. When I and another member where in a terrible car wreck (not our fault. Was rainy and a guy smashed into us) they came and got us from the hospital (luckily no life threatening injuries for this, but the car was totaled). This was in the wee hours of the morning, after they got us they took us out to eat. Like any good community of folks they supported us when we were at a low spot and did so with no hesitation. Likewise, the 'Greek' community supported each other in some small way, be it by going to each others events or donating to each others philanthropies. We competed with one another but we also helped each other succeed.
It also taught me that the stereotypes were not true except for small populations and that stomping out the stereotypes were essential and vital when we encountered them. One non-Greek thinking that all Greeks were alcoholics was harmful not only to my fraternity but to every fraternity, and when someone would complain about Greeks and then cite a specific fraternity some defense of the members may have been in order. Or maybe just the assertion and reassurance that all fraternity men were not like that.
There is strength in numbers. There is no doubt about that. There is a reason that despite all the bad press, the bad media, and the fuck-ups that fraternities around the nation have made they still continue to thrive. It is because they stick together. Regardless of what council they belonged to or what fraternity they were in they didn't allow themselves to be divided and conquered.
Out of all the lessons I learned, strength in numbers is the most critical lesson of all. Sannion recently wrote a post called Polytheism Without Borders in which he issued a call to Polytheists of all stripes and cultures to be stand and counted and to help one another. To band together and be strong and support one another. With that notion in mind, I hafta ask.
What can I do for you? Contact me in the comments below or at fathergia@yahoo.com
I am here to serve.
I know, I know, you must have fallen out of your chair at that sentence, so I'll give you a minute to compose yourself.
Done? Okay.
It was my Freshman year of College. I had never really thought about fraternities or joining one, I thought it certainly wasn't for me. At my Freshman orientation I found out about them and found out about all the wonderful opportunities they could afford me. I though well, maybe there is something to it. I carefully began investigating the available fraternities, I checked their pages, scoured for photos, and basically saw what kind of air they gave off. Did they seem aggressive? Douchy? Friendly? Kind? I rushed and only went to one fraternity's events, Phi Kappa Tau.
They seemed like good guys, they had a good mixture of folks. Some were geeky like myself, some were conservative, some were gay, some were liberal, but none of them were 'bros'. I was enthralled when I received a bid from them.
 | ||
| Two other young men also received bids |
Bid day was interesting, it was surprising to see how many other folks received bids from the different fraternities and how diverse they were. There were some guys who were clearly destined to become the bro-esque guys that swim in alcohol and party all the time. There were other guys who looked like skater punks. There were exceptionally flamboyant men, there were exceptionally manly men. Men of every stripe, creed, race, and orientation were there to receive bids that morning. Going up on stage and accepting the bid was kind of exhilarating to be honest.
Then came the pinning. Being pinned was. . .definitely an experience. It was the first act of initiation into the group when I became recognized as an associate member (and thus not fully initiated.), Three other men were pinned with me (one was picked up shortly after the formal pledge period). I wore that pin with pride. I was proud to be a part of the group, proud of what we were doing and what we would do. I saw success in our future. You see, at that time we were what is known as a 'colony' meaning we didn't have a charter yet but were working towards getting one. At the time of the pinning I was convinced we'd have one very soon.
Homecoming rolled around shortly after I got pinned and I got to experience the pleasure of pomping a float. In case you don't know, pomping is an insanely tedious and repetitive task that will eventually result in you getting pomping tissue stuck to your jeans due to the spray on glue. It was a lot of work, and I didn't even do a ton of pomping when compared to the lovely ladies of Kappa Kappa Gamma (I tell you, they wanted to WIN that float contest.) I even got to ride on the float and wave to little kids, make eagle shouts. It was a great deal of fun.
Eventually though, some conflicts with other people and disagreements with where some of the leadership was going led me to drop. To this day I'm not entirely sure if that was the right decision on my part. I had a lot of fun with these guys though, and being in a fraternity gave me some experiences and some particular perspectives.
There are a few things I learned from this.
The first one is that organization is not a bad thing nor is leadership. Sure, when you have this stuff you have a lot of petty politics that occurs and a bit of tiara chasing occurs but you also are able to get more work done than an individual person. We volunteered and cleaned up parks, staffed SUSAN G KOMEN events and worked at a charity haunted house and in each one of these things our group did more work than an individual could do by themselves. We were able to do this through communication and organization, and we had people volunteer that normally wouldn't to help make the group look better.
You also look out for each other and support each other. When I and another member where in a terrible car wreck (not our fault. Was rainy and a guy smashed into us) they came and got us from the hospital (luckily no life threatening injuries for this, but the car was totaled). This was in the wee hours of the morning, after they got us they took us out to eat. Like any good community of folks they supported us when we were at a low spot and did so with no hesitation. Likewise, the 'Greek' community supported each other in some small way, be it by going to each others events or donating to each others philanthropies. We competed with one another but we also helped each other succeed.
It also taught me that the stereotypes were not true except for small populations and that stomping out the stereotypes were essential and vital when we encountered them. One non-Greek thinking that all Greeks were alcoholics was harmful not only to my fraternity but to every fraternity, and when someone would complain about Greeks and then cite a specific fraternity some defense of the members may have been in order. Or maybe just the assertion and reassurance that all fraternity men were not like that.
There is strength in numbers. There is no doubt about that. There is a reason that despite all the bad press, the bad media, and the fuck-ups that fraternities around the nation have made they still continue to thrive. It is because they stick together. Regardless of what council they belonged to or what fraternity they were in they didn't allow themselves to be divided and conquered.
Out of all the lessons I learned, strength in numbers is the most critical lesson of all. Sannion recently wrote a post called Polytheism Without Borders in which he issued a call to Polytheists of all stripes and cultures to be stand and counted and to help one another. To band together and be strong and support one another. With that notion in mind, I hafta ask.
What can I do for you? Contact me in the comments below or at fathergia@yahoo.com
I am here to serve.
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
Monday, August 5, 2013
Lament to Athena [Poetry]
Hear my cries dear Aegis
Be my strength and my landing shore
Oh how, you cold-eyed goddess?
Do I sustain myself?
On the hopes of generations
And on the soil of dead and ruined men.
Hear my cries great Goddess
Be the sharpness of my tongue
How then, will I begin to build?
When given no tools
Nor source of light
Oh Savior, a forest of trees yet no axe.
A quarry of stone yet no pick.
A clear-sighted man fumbling in the dark for matches
Hear my cries Daughter of Zeus
Be the deftness of my hands
I beg tell, when will I see warmth?
When my fellows are not fellows
When the friends are only friends
When the union of faith is not met at the hearth
Not consummated by consuming flame
When the only voice lifted in song is my own
Hear my cries dearest one
Be the beating of my heart
Oh how, Mater Athene
Do I know peace and security
When my roof leaks and my door does not lock
When faith does not make friends
And when I fear perpetual solitude
I've almost forgotten
When peace was not an illusion
When I could smell the scent of friends
Voices lifted in worship to a jealous god.
I kneel in front of you
You clasp your hands in mine.
Together we raise our voices.
For a second my heart and mind are quiet
I have answers to my questions
They are not the ones I want
Only shall I know peace
If I carve it out myself.
Lend me your spear, oh war-like Goddess.
Be my strength and my landing shore
Oh how, you cold-eyed goddess?
Do I sustain myself?
On the hopes of generations
And on the soil of dead and ruined men.
Hear my cries great Goddess
Be the sharpness of my tongue
How then, will I begin to build?
When given no tools
Nor source of light
Oh Savior, a forest of trees yet no axe.
A quarry of stone yet no pick.
A clear-sighted man fumbling in the dark for matches
Hear my cries Daughter of Zeus
Be the deftness of my hands
I beg tell, when will I see warmth?
When my fellows are not fellows
When the friends are only friends
When the union of faith is not met at the hearth
Not consummated by consuming flame
When the only voice lifted in song is my own
Hear my cries dearest one
Be the beating of my heart
Oh how, Mater Athene
Do I know peace and security
When my roof leaks and my door does not lock
When faith does not make friends
And when I fear perpetual solitude
I've almost forgotten
When peace was not an illusion
When I could smell the scent of friends
Voices lifted in worship to a jealous god.
I kneel in front of you
You clasp your hands in mine.
Together we raise our voices.
For a second my heart and mind are quiet
I have answers to my questions
They are not the ones I want
Only shall I know peace
If I carve it out myself.
Lend me your spear, oh war-like Goddess.
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Impiety and Magic
This whole 'magic is hubris' bullshit needs to stop.
Seriously, I have seen it tear apart group after group, get people's feelings hurt and just destroy harmony and the notion that we might be able to talk with others in an open and honest way. It drives people away and scares them off for a start, and all of it is entirely unnecessary.
The folks that I see often claiming that 'magic is hubris' usually have one thing in common. They either came to Hellenismos after a stint in practicing Wicca or look up to/heavily admire a person who has done so. It seems to me that many of those folks who rail against magic so hard are the kind of folks who are trying to put as much distance between themselves and their Neo-Pagan background as possible. They seem to be terrified that Hellenismos might somehow get lumped in the Neo-Paganism (surprise guys, it already is by outsiders) and as such rail against common elements in Neo-Paganism, especially the over-emphasis on magic. It seems to me that they have something to prove, so they try to prove it by bashing on 'magic-users' and 'rooting them out' from Hellenismos like they are some kind of Athenian Inquistion squad.
Firstly, whether or not someone is Hellenic is not contingent upon whether or not they practice in magical acts or arts. Individual practice is not really that relevant to the 'classification' of the person. Are they performing the household rites? Yes? Are they performing them in the traditional format? Yes? Are they following some sort of lunar calendar, be it reconstituted or directly drawn from? Yes? Do they honor all the Olympians? Yes? Okay, as far as I'm concerned that person is pretty damn well into the "Is an adherent of Hellenismos" category. The general rebuttal to this assertion though is "well magic is impious! You can't have an impious practice and be a real Hellenist." Now, I'm going to call that bullshit spewing from your mouth and break it down for you right now.
I'll pull this post since he pretty much just regurgitated the most common arguments that I see people spew.
He first asserts that magic is a way that a person attempts to exert and force his or her will on the Gods and cosmos. Firstly, seeing as I've talked to and am friends with a number of these 'magic users' I can pretty much tell you right now that the very statement that they are trying to 'force' the gods or cosmos to do ANYTHING is bullshit, at least when the individual in question is a polytheist. Generally I have seen them try to get a particular god's assistance in this or that (much in the same way that your typical Hellenist might try to get a god's assistance by petitioning them). When they don't 'invoke' or 'invite' a God for the spell, they generally say that they are sending out energy into the world to help them achieve their goals. This is not an act of 'manipulation'. These people also don't think that they are somehow better than or above the gods. They know the gods are greater than they and they will admit to that in a heartbeat. The notion that they think they are above the gods is a disgusting straw man.
However, our lovely Flemish friend also seems to think that the Gods are in control of every little aspect of the universe as he says:
"Magic is seen as a way in which someone, man or women, attempts to influence the Gods or the kósmos based on ones own will and power, by means of sympathetic or other connections. It constitutes a manipulation by means of which one seeks to impose ones own will on the Gods and kósmos, and attempts to subject them to ones will in order to achieve a certain goal.
Quite obviously such an attitude is utterly unacceptable in Hellenismos. The Gods are the fundamental powers that cause, keep, sustain, harmonize, transform, etc., the kósmos, and they are far beyond human understanding. None can ever completely understand their entire being and greatness. The thought that a mortal even could ever manipulate the Gods or the kósmos in such wicked ways is beyond ridiculous, this preposterous attitude places oneself above the Gods who cause our very existence!"
which is all fine and good I suppose, but such a view necessitates a few things. He either has to think that all other pantheons are 'false' to some degree or the other OR he has to admit to there being a 'universal pantheon' of gods that expresses itself in each culture. Folks who adhere to the first viewpoint I have nothing to say to. Folks who adhere to the second can't possibly claim that magic is impious as there are MANY cultures throughout history and even in the world today that practice some form or the other of sympathetic magic or other variants who are considered perfectly pious, and wonderful folks, and apparently their gods don't give half a damn about it. From the stance of the universal pantheon then, we can conclude that the 'impiety' of magic is simply a human construct, one which the gods don't care about, and thus practicing magic is not in of itself impious.
He then goes on to say:
"Others within the (neo)pagan movement claim to “work with” the Gods to help the kósmos or fate unfold, when they practice their magic. From a Hellenic point of view this is only marginally better than the previous attitude, in that one doesn’t place oneself above the Gods. But one does place oneself on the same level as the Gods. Which is only marginally less preposterous."
Hold on there buckoo, step back and have a cigarette. I don't think 'working with' someone places yourself on the same level as them, last I checked just because I am a co-worker with my manager doesn't mean that I see myself as equal to him within the company. Working with also automatically has implications of hierarchy, but does not implicate status IN the hierarchy. The dribble that he spouted is yet another example of a fallacious strawman set-up by a person who refuses to think about things and who only wants to spout what he has heard others tell him.
For modern day persons and their magical practices it seems that it is not an act of manipulation or coercion, deception or force. It is simply something that is done, a variant on prayer and ritual, and honestly when you stop to think about it is something that is very difficult to define. They are not impious folks, and I'm sure that if the Gods had a legitimate problem with them practicing magic as well as being a Hellenist, they'd let them know about it.
One last quick note, magic is not an intrinsically Hellenic practice, really and truly. However, just because it is not *intrinsically* Hellenic does not mean that a Hellenist can't practice it. Hellenismos is not a religion in which the actions of the individual are the sole criterion for 'belonging'. It is, as I stated before, a household religion, and thus by performing the household rites and observances in the traditional fashion (or as close to it as you are able to get) you are clearly a Hellenist. Personal non-Hellenic practices should be a non-issue. If I choose to divinate by orthinomancy or by casting lots or by using the tarot is of no concern to you. Two of those are traditionally Hellenic, one is not, however it is an individual and personal choice. If someone was a Hellenist for 25 years, if someone erected an altar to Zeus and Hera and built them a temple, if this someone suddenly decided that they wanted to use the tarot for their own *personal and private* divinatory sessions would you suddenly throw your hands up in the air and shout "YOU AREN'T A REAL HELLENIST!". I wouldn't. So it goes for magical practices.
And to pre-empt certain objections, no I don't practice magic. I just would like to see us stop devouring, berating, and driving away good and pious people because they have one personal practice that is 'non-traditional'. I'll bet you dollars to donuts we ALL do something that is non-traditional, because last I checked we aren't having processions to Mount Olympus.
We have two choices my fellow Hellenists.
Grow the hell up or we die.
Pick one.
Seriously, I have seen it tear apart group after group, get people's feelings hurt and just destroy harmony and the notion that we might be able to talk with others in an open and honest way. It drives people away and scares them off for a start, and all of it is entirely unnecessary.
The folks that I see often claiming that 'magic is hubris' usually have one thing in common. They either came to Hellenismos after a stint in practicing Wicca or look up to/heavily admire a person who has done so. It seems to me that many of those folks who rail against magic so hard are the kind of folks who are trying to put as much distance between themselves and their Neo-Pagan background as possible. They seem to be terrified that Hellenismos might somehow get lumped in the Neo-Paganism (surprise guys, it already is by outsiders) and as such rail against common elements in Neo-Paganism, especially the over-emphasis on magic. It seems to me that they have something to prove, so they try to prove it by bashing on 'magic-users' and 'rooting them out' from Hellenismos like they are some kind of Athenian Inquistion squad.
Firstly, whether or not someone is Hellenic is not contingent upon whether or not they practice in magical acts or arts. Individual practice is not really that relevant to the 'classification' of the person. Are they performing the household rites? Yes? Are they performing them in the traditional format? Yes? Are they following some sort of lunar calendar, be it reconstituted or directly drawn from? Yes? Do they honor all the Olympians? Yes? Okay, as far as I'm concerned that person is pretty damn well into the "Is an adherent of Hellenismos" category. The general rebuttal to this assertion though is "well magic is impious! You can't have an impious practice and be a real Hellenist." Now, I'm going to call that bullshit spewing from your mouth and break it down for you right now.
I'll pull this post since he pretty much just regurgitated the most common arguments that I see people spew.
He first asserts that magic is a way that a person attempts to exert and force his or her will on the Gods and cosmos. Firstly, seeing as I've talked to and am friends with a number of these 'magic users' I can pretty much tell you right now that the very statement that they are trying to 'force' the gods or cosmos to do ANYTHING is bullshit, at least when the individual in question is a polytheist. Generally I have seen them try to get a particular god's assistance in this or that (much in the same way that your typical Hellenist might try to get a god's assistance by petitioning them). When they don't 'invoke' or 'invite' a God for the spell, they generally say that they are sending out energy into the world to help them achieve their goals. This is not an act of 'manipulation'. These people also don't think that they are somehow better than or above the gods. They know the gods are greater than they and they will admit to that in a heartbeat. The notion that they think they are above the gods is a disgusting straw man.
However, our lovely Flemish friend also seems to think that the Gods are in control of every little aspect of the universe as he says:
"Magic is seen as a way in which someone, man or women, attempts to influence the Gods or the kósmos based on ones own will and power, by means of sympathetic or other connections. It constitutes a manipulation by means of which one seeks to impose ones own will on the Gods and kósmos, and attempts to subject them to ones will in order to achieve a certain goal.
Quite obviously such an attitude is utterly unacceptable in Hellenismos. The Gods are the fundamental powers that cause, keep, sustain, harmonize, transform, etc., the kósmos, and they are far beyond human understanding. None can ever completely understand their entire being and greatness. The thought that a mortal even could ever manipulate the Gods or the kósmos in such wicked ways is beyond ridiculous, this preposterous attitude places oneself above the Gods who cause our very existence!"
which is all fine and good I suppose, but such a view necessitates a few things. He either has to think that all other pantheons are 'false' to some degree or the other OR he has to admit to there being a 'universal pantheon' of gods that expresses itself in each culture. Folks who adhere to the first viewpoint I have nothing to say to. Folks who adhere to the second can't possibly claim that magic is impious as there are MANY cultures throughout history and even in the world today that practice some form or the other of sympathetic magic or other variants who are considered perfectly pious, and wonderful folks, and apparently their gods don't give half a damn about it. From the stance of the universal pantheon then, we can conclude that the 'impiety' of magic is simply a human construct, one which the gods don't care about, and thus practicing magic is not in of itself impious.
He then goes on to say:
"Others within the (neo)pagan movement claim to “work with” the Gods to help the kósmos or fate unfold, when they practice their magic. From a Hellenic point of view this is only marginally better than the previous attitude, in that one doesn’t place oneself above the Gods. But one does place oneself on the same level as the Gods. Which is only marginally less preposterous."
Hold on there buckoo, step back and have a cigarette. I don't think 'working with' someone places yourself on the same level as them, last I checked just because I am a co-worker with my manager doesn't mean that I see myself as equal to him within the company. Working with also automatically has implications of hierarchy, but does not implicate status IN the hierarchy. The dribble that he spouted is yet another example of a fallacious strawman set-up by a person who refuses to think about things and who only wants to spout what he has heard others tell him.
For modern day persons and their magical practices it seems that it is not an act of manipulation or coercion, deception or force. It is simply something that is done, a variant on prayer and ritual, and honestly when you stop to think about it is something that is very difficult to define. They are not impious folks, and I'm sure that if the Gods had a legitimate problem with them practicing magic as well as being a Hellenist, they'd let them know about it.
One last quick note, magic is not an intrinsically Hellenic practice, really and truly. However, just because it is not *intrinsically* Hellenic does not mean that a Hellenist can't practice it. Hellenismos is not a religion in which the actions of the individual are the sole criterion for 'belonging'. It is, as I stated before, a household religion, and thus by performing the household rites and observances in the traditional fashion (or as close to it as you are able to get) you are clearly a Hellenist. Personal non-Hellenic practices should be a non-issue. If I choose to divinate by orthinomancy or by casting lots or by using the tarot is of no concern to you. Two of those are traditionally Hellenic, one is not, however it is an individual and personal choice. If someone was a Hellenist for 25 years, if someone erected an altar to Zeus and Hera and built them a temple, if this someone suddenly decided that they wanted to use the tarot for their own *personal and private* divinatory sessions would you suddenly throw your hands up in the air and shout "YOU AREN'T A REAL HELLENIST!". I wouldn't. So it goes for magical practices.
And to pre-empt certain objections, no I don't practice magic. I just would like to see us stop devouring, berating, and driving away good and pious people because they have one personal practice that is 'non-traditional'. I'll bet you dollars to donuts we ALL do something that is non-traditional, because last I checked we aren't having processions to Mount Olympus.
We have two choices my fellow Hellenists.
Grow the hell up or we die.
Pick one.
Thursday, August 1, 2013
Devotional to Apollo
I would like to note that all this was/is hand-written in a blank
journal so I can't just copy/paste things for y'all. I feel that writing
it down in a journal first is a great thing, because it makes you think
very carefully about what you have written and selected to include in
the devotional.
A few more notes, as I have typed this as I have it written a few personal assumptions are made, because I wrote it myself. This is mainly evident in the THUSIA section. I assumed that incense would be burned, and libations would be made. Also be aware that this is designed to be performed at a personal shrine, hence why there is no procession and why the purification is more simple. I have not designed it to be performed at a blazing altar, but it could easily be altered (see what I did there?) to be done as so.
PURIFICATION
Sprinkle yourself and your worship space with khernips.
HYMNODIA
HOMERIC HYMN TO HESTIA
[Light a candle or other flame source]
Hail, daughter of Cronos, now I will remember you and another song also.
HOMERIC HYMN TO APOLLO
How, then, shall I sing of you who in all ways are a worthy theme of song? For everywhere, O Phoebus, the whole range of song is fallen to you, both over the mainland that rears heifers and over the isles. All mountain-peaks and high headlands of lofty hills and rivers flowing out to the deep and beaches sloping seawards and havens of the sea are your delight. Shall I sing how at first Leto bare you to be the joy of men, as she rested against Mount Cynthus in that rocky isle, in sea-grit Delos, while on either hand a dark wave rolled on landwards, driven by shrill winds---whence arising you rule over all mortal men?
HOMERIC HYMN TO APOLLO
Delos, if you would be willing to be the abode of my son Phoebus Apollo and make him a rich temple. For no other will touch you, as you will find, and I think you will never be rich in oxen and sheep, nor bear vintage nor yet produce plants abundantly. But if you have the temple of far-shooting Apollo, all men will bring you hecatombs and gather here, and incessant savor of rich sacrifice will always arise, and you will feed those who dwell in you from the hand of stranger. For truly your own soil is not rich.
HOMERIC HYMN TO APOLLO
Now, when Leto had sworn and ended her oath, Delos was very glad at the birth of the far-shooting lord. But Leto was racked nine days and nine nights with pangs beyond wont. And there with her all the chiefest of the goddesses, Dione and Rhea and Ichnaea and Themis and loud-moaning Amphitrite and the other deathless goddesses, save white-armed Hera who sat in the halls of cloud-gathering Zeus. Only Eilithyia, goddess of that sore travail, had not heard of Leto's trouble, for she sat on top of Olympus beneath golden clouds by white-armed Hera, who kept her close through envy, because Leto with lovely tresses was soon to bear a son, faultless and strong.
HOMERIC HYMN TO HESTIA
Hestia, you who tend the holy house of the lord Apollo, the far-shooter at goodly Pytho, with soft oil dripping ever from your locks, come now into this house, come, having one-mind with Zeus the all wise. Draw ever near, and withal bestow grace upon my song.
PRAYERS
Give prayers and thanksgiving.
THUSIA
Give to Hestia the first, then give to Apollo incense, food, and make libations. Then give votive offerings. Finally give to Hestia the last.
CLOSING
Have a drink at the shrine, contemplate Apollo and the various blessings he has graced your life with. Extinguish the candle/flame source.
A few more notes, as I have typed this as I have it written a few personal assumptions are made, because I wrote it myself. This is mainly evident in the THUSIA section. I assumed that incense would be burned, and libations would be made. Also be aware that this is designed to be performed at a personal shrine, hence why there is no procession and why the purification is more simple. I have not designed it to be performed at a blazing altar, but it could easily be altered (see what I did there?) to be done as so.
PURIFICATION
Sprinkle yourself and your worship space with khernips.
HYMNODIA
HOMERIC HYMN TO HESTIA
[Light a candle or other flame source]
Hail, daughter of Cronos, now I will remember you and another song also.
HOMERIC HYMN TO APOLLO
How, then, shall I sing of you who in all ways are a worthy theme of song? For everywhere, O Phoebus, the whole range of song is fallen to you, both over the mainland that rears heifers and over the isles. All mountain-peaks and high headlands of lofty hills and rivers flowing out to the deep and beaches sloping seawards and havens of the sea are your delight. Shall I sing how at first Leto bare you to be the joy of men, as she rested against Mount Cynthus in that rocky isle, in sea-grit Delos, while on either hand a dark wave rolled on landwards, driven by shrill winds---whence arising you rule over all mortal men?
HOMERIC HYMN TO APOLLO
Delos, if you would be willing to be the abode of my son Phoebus Apollo and make him a rich temple. For no other will touch you, as you will find, and I think you will never be rich in oxen and sheep, nor bear vintage nor yet produce plants abundantly. But if you have the temple of far-shooting Apollo, all men will bring you hecatombs and gather here, and incessant savor of rich sacrifice will always arise, and you will feed those who dwell in you from the hand of stranger. For truly your own soil is not rich.
HOMERIC HYMN TO APOLLO
Now, when Leto had sworn and ended her oath, Delos was very glad at the birth of the far-shooting lord. But Leto was racked nine days and nine nights with pangs beyond wont. And there with her all the chiefest of the goddesses, Dione and Rhea and Ichnaea and Themis and loud-moaning Amphitrite and the other deathless goddesses, save white-armed Hera who sat in the halls of cloud-gathering Zeus. Only Eilithyia, goddess of that sore travail, had not heard of Leto's trouble, for she sat on top of Olympus beneath golden clouds by white-armed Hera, who kept her close through envy, because Leto with lovely tresses was soon to bear a son, faultless and strong.
HOMERIC HYMN TO HESTIA
Hestia, you who tend the holy house of the lord Apollo, the far-shooter at goodly Pytho, with soft oil dripping ever from your locks, come now into this house, come, having one-mind with Zeus the all wise. Draw ever near, and withal bestow grace upon my song.
PRAYERS
Give prayers and thanksgiving.
THUSIA
Give to Hestia the first, then give to Apollo incense, food, and make libations. Then give votive offerings. Finally give to Hestia the last.
CLOSING
Have a drink at the shrine, contemplate Apollo and the various blessings he has graced your life with. Extinguish the candle/flame source.
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Show today 7/31 at 5:30 PM
Have a show today, 7/31 at 5:30 PM. I will be re-telling a variety of Greek myths!
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/storyeyedyouth/2013/07/31/the-castration-of-uranus
Have a listen, it'll be fun!
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/storyeyedyouth/2013/07/31/the-castration-of-uranus
Have a listen, it'll be fun!
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Dare [Poetry]
How dare the waves crash upon the shore!
How dare the tide roll in and out!
When you've lost all you've known
How dare the world continue on its own
How dare the sun rise in the east!
How dare the moon be full and bright!
Death is the harshest mortal plight
The darkest midnight a man ever knows
How dare I continue to live?
How dare they continue to give.
The asymmetry of experience and lifetimes
Uneveness, of this we can be certain
Oh Gods, wonderful and great
A boy so wicked I never did see
Than that handsome fellow in the mirror
Who dares pose as me
How dare the tide roll in and out!
When you've lost all you've known
How dare the world continue on its own
How dare the sun rise in the east!
How dare the moon be full and bright!
Death is the harshest mortal plight
The darkest midnight a man ever knows
How dare I continue to live?
How dare they continue to give.
The asymmetry of experience and lifetimes
Uneveness, of this we can be certain
Oh Gods, wonderful and great
A boy so wicked I never did see
Than that handsome fellow in the mirror
Who dares pose as me
Monday, July 29, 2013
Know Your Opportunity (Καιρον γνωθι)
(DISCLAIMER: I do not claim to be an expert on anything. I'm merely
giving my opinions and interpretations as I see them as being
applicable. We are not an absolutist faith, nor do I personally regard the maxims as infallible)
Maxim: Καιρον γνωθι or "Know your opportunity"
How many times have you missed out on something great (or at least something good) merely because you did not hear the faint knock of opportunity at your door? I know that I have had this happen time and time again. The reasons are many and varied, but the most common and tragic reason for missing out on something wonderful is simply fear.
It is one of the eternals of the human condition. To survive and thrive we must be cautious and plan carefully, but to truly prosper we have to take a chance and take advantage of the opportunities we are given. Oftentimes doing this can be hard and scary. We have to wade into cold and sometimes unforgiving waters where we may have to struggle to fully take advantage of the situation we have been given.
In this maxim there is also a warning to be cautious. When you take it into conjunction with the "Know yourself" maxim that we previously looked at, it is a clear call to truly know what opportunities are and are not yours to take. Sometimes we get greedy or overambitious and get ourselves into places and things that are more than we can handle and we end up damaging ourselves (mentally or physically) and more often than not damaging those around us. Hence being honest with yourself is essential in assessing and determining if you should or should not take a chance.
Think twice, leap once.
Maxim: Καιρον γνωθι or "Know your opportunity"
How many times have you missed out on something great (or at least something good) merely because you did not hear the faint knock of opportunity at your door? I know that I have had this happen time and time again. The reasons are many and varied, but the most common and tragic reason for missing out on something wonderful is simply fear.
It is one of the eternals of the human condition. To survive and thrive we must be cautious and plan carefully, but to truly prosper we have to take a chance and take advantage of the opportunities we are given. Oftentimes doing this can be hard and scary. We have to wade into cold and sometimes unforgiving waters where we may have to struggle to fully take advantage of the situation we have been given.
In this maxim there is also a warning to be cautious. When you take it into conjunction with the "Know yourself" maxim that we previously looked at, it is a clear call to truly know what opportunities are and are not yours to take. Sometimes we get greedy or overambitious and get ourselves into places and things that are more than we can handle and we end up damaging ourselves (mentally or physically) and more often than not damaging those around us. Hence being honest with yourself is essential in assessing and determining if you should or should not take a chance.
Think twice, leap once.
Saturday, July 27, 2013
I'm a Jerk
I'm a jerk.
For real. When I play Monopoly, I go for blood every time. Be I in first place or last place, I am merciless, conniving, and absolutely eat my opponents alive. I hold no prisoners, everyone is executed on the spot and as soon as possible. When someone is terribly, terribly, terribly incorrect about something, I just don't let them know, I let everyone else know too. I once bullied a girl in high school because she was weird and had a mustache.
Oh forgive me father, for I have sinned.
See, the thing about the internet is that you only know as much or as little as I am willing to tell you. I can paint the portrait of myself however I please, be it what I write on here or what I write on social media. The above paragraph could have just as easily been lauding my own virtues. I could have made myself seem like a caring and nurturing person. A lovely and compassionate boy with nothing but goodness in his heart.
But I'm not. I'm human.
So is everyone else you read and interact with online.
Everyone is painting a picture of how they want to be perceived and looked at, whether they or we are aware of it or not. We are all shooting for a particular image, be it the compassionate and contemplative wanderer, the mindful druid, the savior of the faith, or the crazed priest of Dionysos. We are all making an image.
Now this isn't to say that these things are fake or not real. Often times our image is an outward and acted expression of who we are inside, but we do do things to reinforce, repair, salvage, or establish certain traits that we want to have associated with our personal image. Whether the image is true or false time will eventually bare witness to it, but online you can go for years (truly, years) without your image being exposed as phony. You have more time to think about actions when you are online, to think about posts and points. When you meet someone in person you get a more balanced view of who they are, a deeper fullness of character. The more time you spend with someone, the more you fully realize who they are fully and wholly. It is why two people can be madly in love and then six months later be repulsed with one another, and why two people can feel no chemistry at first glance and be getting married three years later and then staying married.
It is why they say never meet your idols. Their humanity destroys your idealization of them. It tears down the image that they have created and that you have credited as being their wholeness. You realize that what you thought you knew was merely illusion, with certain traits being upplayed and others being cast into shadow. Throughout this all, through this realization, I ponder, what kind of image have I created? Do I care? As much as I would like to say I don't, a small part of me does. Another part of me wishes that my readers could see me as who I am more fully. I wish I could sit down and have coffee with many of my readers and many of the people I read myself. But I can't, not yet anyway. Maybe someday.
Remember, even Oprah poops.
For real. When I play Monopoly, I go for blood every time. Be I in first place or last place, I am merciless, conniving, and absolutely eat my opponents alive. I hold no prisoners, everyone is executed on the spot and as soon as possible. When someone is terribly, terribly, terribly incorrect about something, I just don't let them know, I let everyone else know too. I once bullied a girl in high school because she was weird and had a mustache.
Oh forgive me father, for I have sinned.
See, the thing about the internet is that you only know as much or as little as I am willing to tell you. I can paint the portrait of myself however I please, be it what I write on here or what I write on social media. The above paragraph could have just as easily been lauding my own virtues. I could have made myself seem like a caring and nurturing person. A lovely and compassionate boy with nothing but goodness in his heart.
But I'm not. I'm human.
So is everyone else you read and interact with online.
Everyone is painting a picture of how they want to be perceived and looked at, whether they or we are aware of it or not. We are all shooting for a particular image, be it the compassionate and contemplative wanderer, the mindful druid, the savior of the faith, or the crazed priest of Dionysos. We are all making an image.
Now this isn't to say that these things are fake or not real. Often times our image is an outward and acted expression of who we are inside, but we do do things to reinforce, repair, salvage, or establish certain traits that we want to have associated with our personal image. Whether the image is true or false time will eventually bare witness to it, but online you can go for years (truly, years) without your image being exposed as phony. You have more time to think about actions when you are online, to think about posts and points. When you meet someone in person you get a more balanced view of who they are, a deeper fullness of character. The more time you spend with someone, the more you fully realize who they are fully and wholly. It is why two people can be madly in love and then six months later be repulsed with one another, and why two people can feel no chemistry at first glance and be getting married three years later and then staying married.
It is why they say never meet your idols. Their humanity destroys your idealization of them. It tears down the image that they have created and that you have credited as being their wholeness. You realize that what you thought you knew was merely illusion, with certain traits being upplayed and others being cast into shadow. Throughout this all, through this realization, I ponder, what kind of image have I created? Do I care? As much as I would like to say I don't, a small part of me does. Another part of me wishes that my readers could see me as who I am more fully. I wish I could sit down and have coffee with many of my readers and many of the people I read myself. But I can't, not yet anyway. Maybe someday.
Remember, even Oprah poops.
 |
| by Joe Crimmings Photography on flickr |
Friday, July 26, 2013
Hymn to Zeus [Original Hymn]
Zeus, much honored king
Bringer of Justice
How shall I sing of your gifts?
How shall I know your justice?
Father of many
Proud and terrible God
How many before me have called to you?
How many after me will?
Only you know, glorious king
Hail, loud-thundering Zeus.
 |
| Zeus taken by crafterm on Flickr |
Wednesday, July 24, 2013
Equate with Care
Recently, I've been seeing some talk on if deities like Helios, Ra, and Sol Invictus are all the same God or entirely separate Gods. The biggest driving force behind this seems to be the small little fact that we only have one sun. If we only have one sun, then it kind of makes it hard to maintain a completely hard polytheistic stance for certain individuals. Therefore, they equate solar deities with relative disregard for whether or not those deities share the same domains or fulfill similar roles. You also run into the fact that in some cultures the sun deity is female and not male. The most two prominent examples for me are Sunna and Amateratsu. So if your logic is simply "All Sun deities are the same deity" and you equate Ra with Amateratsu then you are generating a bit of a problem.
Generally when folks equate two deities they equate deities of the same gender. Hence why people don't tend to say that Hera is the same as Indra or that Isis is the same as Apollon. However, by saying that Amateratsu is the same as Ra you 'break' this 'rule' and therefore have to open yourself up to other interpretations. If we are equating gods only on what natural phenomena they are associated with, why don't we equate say Zeus and Pele? Maybe Brigid and Hephaestus? Even equating based on role and function can get kind of messy, Brigid and Hephaestus are both smithing Gods, can we equate them on these grounds? I think most people would say no.
Then what does it mean for these Gods who rule over domains that there is only one of? How do we potentially reconcile this dissonance? Well, I don't know how much this will help you, dear reader, but this is the ways in which I can reconcile it.
In the case of ruling over things which there are only one of, such as the Sun, or ruling over phenomena, I think it is best to look at those things as symbols of the God's power. For Ra the Sun represents his immense and mighty power, for Helios the Sun represents his watchful eye (and those two examples are way oversimplified, I know.) I have seen folks use the symbolism explanation for Zeus's association with lightning and rain taking those as symbols for his might and fertility (respectively). I just don't see why they can't do that for Gods so obviously different as Ra and Helios and Amateratsu.
In the same vein as this, they could very well 'share' the role. The example I saw used was Hades and Anubis, does that mean that there are different afterlives assuming of course, that they aren't the same. I'd have to answer with a resounding 'yes'. We don't give the gods a lot of credit sometimes, is it so hard to believe that beings with the power and ability to act with agency on our lives wouldn't be capable of 'creating' multiple afterlife scenarios? Does that mean I think that there is an afterlife for each and every Death God and Goddess? Absolutely not, however I wouldn't be surprised if there were in fact multiple possibilities for the afterlife.
In the case of having similar roles, I think it could very well be an expression of a different God in a different culture, however I think that you have to examine that God or Goddess in their entirety and really meditate on whether or not they are truly the same entity and not make snap judgements by going "Hearth Goddess, Hearth Goddess, definitely equal". You must examine the God or Goddess fully and then really decide if it is the same as a God or Goddess within your own pantheon. After all, just because I am a student doesn't mean that all other students are me. Likewise, we know each doctor is an individual. Dr. Martinez is not Dr. Li simply because they have the same role in life.
So then, that comes to the question of how many Gods and Goddesses exist. I have heard some Hellenists state 12, 24, or 36 with all other Gods being aspects of those. Some Hindus state that there is only one God with all other Gods being aspects of that one God. Many Shintoists would state that there are 8 million gods(kami), if you translate the phrase literally at least. Colloquially it means that they consider there to be a practically infinite number of Gods(kami).
How then do you decide who is right? Most people simply go with whatever their particular faith says or model the number off their faith's 'central' Gods. Though many faiths don't require the adherent to 'come up with' a number. That is something that is completely and totally going to vary from person to person. Me? I'm going to just say I flat out don't know, and am only equating when I just feel really strongly about it. So far I've only equated Neith-Athene-Saraswati and Hanuman-Hermes-Mercury and Sol-Helios. That's it. I used to equate Freyja and Aphrodite but I've since pulled that back for further examination. Regardless of the equating I have made though, I won't begin to worship Athena in an Egyptian or Hindu fashion. I will treat them separately and as if they are all distinct individual goddesses, because at the end of the day I'm just incapable of being one hundred percent certain. I'd hate to rob a god or goddess of what they rightly deserve because I've made a mistake and confused them for some other deity.
Our ancestors used equating the gods as a means to understand foreign gods and cultures. I'm also sure that there must have been some dissonance in finding out that someone else also believed that their gods and goddesses had absolute control over the universe. Instead of taking the route of 'shared power' they took the route of 'same gods, different names'. I personally suspect that the first answer is right for some gods and the second is right for others. Which is which for which particular god and goddess is up for us to deduce on our own.
I guess if you could take anything from this it would be two simple things. Treat each God and Goddess as if they are distinct and equate them with care.
Generally when folks equate two deities they equate deities of the same gender. Hence why people don't tend to say that Hera is the same as Indra or that Isis is the same as Apollon. However, by saying that Amateratsu is the same as Ra you 'break' this 'rule' and therefore have to open yourself up to other interpretations. If we are equating gods only on what natural phenomena they are associated with, why don't we equate say Zeus and Pele? Maybe Brigid and Hephaestus? Even equating based on role and function can get kind of messy, Brigid and Hephaestus are both smithing Gods, can we equate them on these grounds? I think most people would say no.
Then what does it mean for these Gods who rule over domains that there is only one of? How do we potentially reconcile this dissonance? Well, I don't know how much this will help you, dear reader, but this is the ways in which I can reconcile it.
In the case of ruling over things which there are only one of, such as the Sun, or ruling over phenomena, I think it is best to look at those things as symbols of the God's power. For Ra the Sun represents his immense and mighty power, for Helios the Sun represents his watchful eye (and those two examples are way oversimplified, I know.) I have seen folks use the symbolism explanation for Zeus's association with lightning and rain taking those as symbols for his might and fertility (respectively). I just don't see why they can't do that for Gods so obviously different as Ra and Helios and Amateratsu.
In the same vein as this, they could very well 'share' the role. The example I saw used was Hades and Anubis, does that mean that there are different afterlives assuming of course, that they aren't the same. I'd have to answer with a resounding 'yes'. We don't give the gods a lot of credit sometimes, is it so hard to believe that beings with the power and ability to act with agency on our lives wouldn't be capable of 'creating' multiple afterlife scenarios? Does that mean I think that there is an afterlife for each and every Death God and Goddess? Absolutely not, however I wouldn't be surprised if there were in fact multiple possibilities for the afterlife.
In the case of having similar roles, I think it could very well be an expression of a different God in a different culture, however I think that you have to examine that God or Goddess in their entirety and really meditate on whether or not they are truly the same entity and not make snap judgements by going "Hearth Goddess, Hearth Goddess, definitely equal". You must examine the God or Goddess fully and then really decide if it is the same as a God or Goddess within your own pantheon. After all, just because I am a student doesn't mean that all other students are me. Likewise, we know each doctor is an individual. Dr. Martinez is not Dr. Li simply because they have the same role in life.
So then, that comes to the question of how many Gods and Goddesses exist. I have heard some Hellenists state 12, 24, or 36 with all other Gods being aspects of those. Some Hindus state that there is only one God with all other Gods being aspects of that one God. Many Shintoists would state that there are 8 million gods(kami), if you translate the phrase literally at least. Colloquially it means that they consider there to be a practically infinite number of Gods(kami).
How then do you decide who is right? Most people simply go with whatever their particular faith says or model the number off their faith's 'central' Gods. Though many faiths don't require the adherent to 'come up with' a number. That is something that is completely and totally going to vary from person to person. Me? I'm going to just say I flat out don't know, and am only equating when I just feel really strongly about it. So far I've only equated Neith-Athene-Saraswati and Hanuman-Hermes-Mercury and Sol-Helios. That's it. I used to equate Freyja and Aphrodite but I've since pulled that back for further examination. Regardless of the equating I have made though, I won't begin to worship Athena in an Egyptian or Hindu fashion. I will treat them separately and as if they are all distinct individual goddesses, because at the end of the day I'm just incapable of being one hundred percent certain. I'd hate to rob a god or goddess of what they rightly deserve because I've made a mistake and confused them for some other deity.
Our ancestors used equating the gods as a means to understand foreign gods and cultures. I'm also sure that there must have been some dissonance in finding out that someone else also believed that their gods and goddesses had absolute control over the universe. Instead of taking the route of 'shared power' they took the route of 'same gods, different names'. I personally suspect that the first answer is right for some gods and the second is right for others. Which is which for which particular god and goddess is up for us to deduce on our own.
I guess if you could take anything from this it would be two simple things. Treat each God and Goddess as if they are distinct and equate them with care.
 | ||
| Athena by nattywoohoo on Flickr |
 | |
| Neith and Amun by risotto al caviale on Flickr |
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| Saraswati by Delphine Wa-Dag on Flickr |
Monday, July 22, 2013
Heat Struck
I sit here, my head throbbing from being out in the heat too long today. I've had two glasses of cool water and some acetaminophen, they've taken the edge off, sadly they haven't done more than that.
I sit her in relative silence, my roommates have left for the summer and so during the week I'm alone. The only noise I get is from my Netflix movies, the video games I play, and the cicadas outside my window. I don't get to interact with people much lately, at least not on the level of friends. If I'm lucky I will get to before my labs, but during the week I just don't speak to folks much. Thankfully, on the weekends I get to see my boyfriend.
So all these things combined together, it means I get to think a lot and I get to read a lot. I get to think, relatively uninterrupted. I get to think about all manner of things too. My relationship with the gods, their actuality, how I am, how I'm happy, how I might strengthen my community, the ambiguity of words. Sometimes, the ambiguity of polytheism itself. The strangeness and uncertainty of things.
My place in this world, my place in my own faith, my place in the pagan community.
I think about folks who have helped me grow, who have angered me and frustrated me. Folks I've treated with contempt for saying just downright stupid stuff. Folks who I haven't given as much due as they should have gotten. Folks who I've fawned on too much.
There is something that is almost magical about waking up each morning and doing my devotions. There is something magical about spending a lazy Sunday afternoon in your lover's arms. There is something magical about a person in your organization taking the time out of their day to chat with you and help you sort your own personal stuff out.
Even in all the turmoil, the stress, the failures, the money problems. Even in all this I realize how truly lucky I am, and I am truly grateful to the gods, to my friends, to everyone who has helped. I have a lot to be grateful for. When I express this sentiment and someone quips "Well yeah, but you still have to put up with those things though. They could be so much better." Yes, they could be, but they could also be so much worse. Only by the chance occurrences, have I made it through any of this okay. My own actions have harmed me, but the small little things I've done and the tiny choices I've made have helped me, and likewise the tiny choices others have made have helped me. I'm incredibly blessed.
Call it luck, I'll call it kharis.
I sit her in relative silence, my roommates have left for the summer and so during the week I'm alone. The only noise I get is from my Netflix movies, the video games I play, and the cicadas outside my window. I don't get to interact with people much lately, at least not on the level of friends. If I'm lucky I will get to before my labs, but during the week I just don't speak to folks much. Thankfully, on the weekends I get to see my boyfriend.
So all these things combined together, it means I get to think a lot and I get to read a lot. I get to think, relatively uninterrupted. I get to think about all manner of things too. My relationship with the gods, their actuality, how I am, how I'm happy, how I might strengthen my community, the ambiguity of words. Sometimes, the ambiguity of polytheism itself. The strangeness and uncertainty of things.
My place in this world, my place in my own faith, my place in the pagan community.
I think about folks who have helped me grow, who have angered me and frustrated me. Folks I've treated with contempt for saying just downright stupid stuff. Folks who I haven't given as much due as they should have gotten. Folks who I've fawned on too much.
There is something that is almost magical about waking up each morning and doing my devotions. There is something magical about spending a lazy Sunday afternoon in your lover's arms. There is something magical about a person in your organization taking the time out of their day to chat with you and help you sort your own personal stuff out.
Even in all the turmoil, the stress, the failures, the money problems. Even in all this I realize how truly lucky I am, and I am truly grateful to the gods, to my friends, to everyone who has helped. I have a lot to be grateful for. When I express this sentiment and someone quips "Well yeah, but you still have to put up with those things though. They could be so much better." Yes, they could be, but they could also be so much worse. Only by the chance occurrences, have I made it through any of this okay. My own actions have harmed me, but the small little things I've done and the tiny choices I've made have helped me, and likewise the tiny choices others have made have helped me. I'm incredibly blessed.
Call it luck, I'll call it kharis.
Friday, July 19, 2013
Game of Choices
In life you must make lots of choices.
Make lots of little sacrifices and decisions. What you are willing to do without for something or someone. What you are willing to give up, not for the benefit of the self, but rather for the benefit of the other.
Yes, life is about choices.
Often times we make a choice thinking that we might get to have it all, but the fact of the matter is that we don't get to have it all. Sometimes when we make a choice we must deny ourselves certain pleasures and luxuries. When we proclaim certain things sometimes it comes with a sacrifice or a sort of abstinence that we were unaware that would be required. Sometimes our choices come with added requirements and stipulations we knew nothing about. Sometimes we are the illiterate farmer scratching an X on a document.
When I first entered Hellenismos, I wasn't aware of there being so few people. I wasn't aware that overall, we are a pretty damn small community, we are a minority within a minority. Where Kemetics and Heathens seem to be able to band together and have at least one meet-up in a state, Hellenists seem very lucky to have one regular group in a three-state region. When I made the choice to be a Hellenist, I wasn't quite aware that I was also making the choice to feel religiously isolated and alone in my own faith, however untrue my logical brain knows that to be. Now, to a lot of people this doesn't seem so bad. A lot of people seem perfectly capable of managing on their own, I am not a lot of people. I need some regular form of interaction. I would like some knowledge that my faith isn't going to be struggling for survival fifty years from now (because, lets face it, we are.) and it scares me. Yes, I'll admit it, it does scare me quite a bit.
But, I did make a choice, and now knowing full well what lies in wait and what the consequences are, I continue to make a choice. Every single new moon I make the same choice, whether I know it or not. Only in ruminating on choice did I realize this. Every new moon I am making a choice to choose loneliness, and choose uncertainty about the future of my faith. Why? To what end? Most rational people I suppose would simply say that the best option is probably to turn to something else, something that fulfills more of my needs. As I told a friend though, simply put, I can't. It would be like forcing yourself to fall out of love with someone you are madly in love with simply because you saw someone fifteen percent more attractive.
I have these struggles with feeling alone and isolated about every two months I've noticed, and I've realized that is okay. Because each time it does pass. Each time I do get better. It is only in this time that I've realized that I have choice, totally, fully, and completely, and every time I am choosing of my own volition to continue doing what I'm doing. And I take a certain weird kind of pleasure in denying myself.
I feel like I may just have to accept that lack of community may be a part of it for a very long time. The sooner I make peace with that, the happier I will be.
After all, what will happen, will happen.
Make lots of little sacrifices and decisions. What you are willing to do without for something or someone. What you are willing to give up, not for the benefit of the self, but rather for the benefit of the other.
Yes, life is about choices.
Often times we make a choice thinking that we might get to have it all, but the fact of the matter is that we don't get to have it all. Sometimes when we make a choice we must deny ourselves certain pleasures and luxuries. When we proclaim certain things sometimes it comes with a sacrifice or a sort of abstinence that we were unaware that would be required. Sometimes our choices come with added requirements and stipulations we knew nothing about. Sometimes we are the illiterate farmer scratching an X on a document.
When I first entered Hellenismos, I wasn't aware of there being so few people. I wasn't aware that overall, we are a pretty damn small community, we are a minority within a minority. Where Kemetics and Heathens seem to be able to band together and have at least one meet-up in a state, Hellenists seem very lucky to have one regular group in a three-state region. When I made the choice to be a Hellenist, I wasn't quite aware that I was also making the choice to feel religiously isolated and alone in my own faith, however untrue my logical brain knows that to be. Now, to a lot of people this doesn't seem so bad. A lot of people seem perfectly capable of managing on their own, I am not a lot of people. I need some regular form of interaction. I would like some knowledge that my faith isn't going to be struggling for survival fifty years from now (because, lets face it, we are.) and it scares me. Yes, I'll admit it, it does scare me quite a bit.
But, I did make a choice, and now knowing full well what lies in wait and what the consequences are, I continue to make a choice. Every single new moon I make the same choice, whether I know it or not. Only in ruminating on choice did I realize this. Every new moon I am making a choice to choose loneliness, and choose uncertainty about the future of my faith. Why? To what end? Most rational people I suppose would simply say that the best option is probably to turn to something else, something that fulfills more of my needs. As I told a friend though, simply put, I can't. It would be like forcing yourself to fall out of love with someone you are madly in love with simply because you saw someone fifteen percent more attractive.
I have these struggles with feeling alone and isolated about every two months I've noticed, and I've realized that is okay. Because each time it does pass. Each time I do get better. It is only in this time that I've realized that I have choice, totally, fully, and completely, and every time I am choosing of my own volition to continue doing what I'm doing. And I take a certain weird kind of pleasure in denying myself.
I feel like I may just have to accept that lack of community may be a part of it for a very long time. The sooner I make peace with that, the happier I will be.
After all, what will happen, will happen.
Wednesday, July 17, 2013
Music
Watch this video first
What did you feel? How did it make you feel? Did you find it easier to empathize with Ceres and/or Demeter? Has it given you any ability to better understand that story? Listen carefully to the lyrics once again. How did it make you feel? Leave your answer in the comments
Music is an important religious tool. Music can help us come closer to our Gods, it can make us better to able understand them. It can be an expression of devotion and adoration. Music is a wonderful gift that we humans have in understanding divinity. It aids us.
What is more beautiful? This song, or one sung by a woman by herself while pouring out libations? Which one do you think the Gods rejoice in more?
I'm beginning to understand why a couple of folks elder than myself have told me that the best music at a ritual is that music which you make yourself. Even if it isn't beautiful or breathtaking, music we create ourselves is an offering from the heart to the Gods. Music carefully selected for a rite is one too, though in my opinion a lesser one, and music picked haphazardly isn't one at all.
This isn't meant to discount beautiful songs like this one though. On the contrary. Music like this can help us draw closer to the Gods when we are by ourselves and better able to immerse ourselves fully into it, when we aren't making it as an offering to the Gods, and when we are just trying to understand them and meditate on them. It can be a huge help.
Remember the power that music can have.
Monday, July 15, 2013
Sacred Band [Lyrics]
(Currently looking for a musician to bring these to life)
Gentle water upon my brow
Gentle rain upon my cheek
I smile towards the sky
Gentle rain on the scorched earth
We don't have much time
And I can't quite say it
Lets stand side by side
As the giants slay us
And we take our place
Deep inside Ge
The heavens opened up
And the rain became a pour
And the pour became deluge
All light in heaven subsumed
We will not win this war
We both know that, don't we?
We don't have much time
And I can't quite say it
Lets stand side by side
As the giants slay us
And we take our place
Deep inside Ge
We never stood a chance, did we?
You and I, as we fought
Overpowered, outnumbered
We never stood a chance, did we?
Now for you I swear it
Tonight if you die here, I will too
We don't have much time
And I can't quite say it
Lets stand side by side
As the giants slay us
And we take our place
Deep inside Ge
Gentle water upon my brow
Gentle rain upon my cheek
I smile towards the sky
Gentle rain on four tired eyes
These last few moments
I could not be happier
Gentle water upon my brow
Gentle rain upon my cheek
I smile towards the sky
Gentle rain on the scorched earth
We don't have much time
And I can't quite say it
Lets stand side by side
As the giants slay us
And we take our place
Deep inside Ge
The heavens opened up
And the rain became a pour
And the pour became deluge
All light in heaven subsumed
We will not win this war
We both know that, don't we?
We don't have much time
And I can't quite say it
Lets stand side by side
As the giants slay us
And we take our place
Deep inside Ge
We never stood a chance, did we?
You and I, as we fought
Overpowered, outnumbered
We never stood a chance, did we?
Now for you I swear it
Tonight if you die here, I will too
We don't have much time
And I can't quite say it
Lets stand side by side
As the giants slay us
And we take our place
Deep inside Ge
Gentle water upon my brow
Gentle rain upon my cheek
I smile towards the sky
Gentle rain on four tired eyes
These last few moments
I could not be happier
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About Me
- Conor W.
- Texas
- A young man living in North Texas. He is an actor, a Hellenistos, and a proud member of Hellenion.